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Thread: Funnies Thread - Feel Free to Add More

  1. #581
    Team Bus Driver Sid Snot's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dirty Harry View Post
    Old Sid Snot walks into a chemist's shop and asks for a packet of condoms.
    The assistant says 'Surely a man of your age doesn't need condoms?'
    Sid replies 'No, I don't actually need them, but I just like the smell of burning rubber!'


    Clean Sheets Win Championships. UP THE NOBBERS & CURRY POWER

  2. #582
    Youth Team
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    Oct 2012
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    '' I was lucky enough to he to see my favorite band in concert last night. R.E.M. Even managed to get backstage and meet them....Even agreed to a ' Selfie ' ! Here it is......' That's me in the corner ' !


    [IMG][img=http://s6.postimg.org/m9nar3qal/Copy_of_joke.jpg][/IMG]

  3. #583
    Transfer Target daddyman16's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by priest View Post
    '' I was lucky enough to he to see my favorite band in concert last night. R.E.M. Even managed to get backstage and meet them....Even agreed to a ' Selfie ' ! Here it is......' That's me in the corner ' !


    [IMG][img=http://s6.postimg.org/m9nar3qal/Copy_of_joke.jpg][/IMG]

    Haha, good one.
    In the words of Mr. J. Hugill, we shall defend with our fudging hearts.

  4. #584
    Transfer Target daddyman16's Avatar
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    Q.) What's green and smells of pork?



    A.) Kermit the Frog's fingers.
    In the words of Mr. J. Hugill, we shall defend with our fudging hearts.

  5. #585
    Transfer Target
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    The dog is truly a mans best friend.

  6. #586
    Team Bus Driver Sid Snot's Avatar
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    Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties, and never been married. She was admired for her sweetness and kindness to all.
    One afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea. As he sat facing her old Hammond organ, the young minister noticed a cut glass bowl sitting on top of it. The bowl was filled with water, in the water floated, of all things, a condom!
    When she returned with tea and scones, they began to chat. The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water, its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him he could no longer resist. 'Miss Beatrice', he said, 'I wonder if you would tell me about this? He pointed to the bowl. 'Oh, yes,' she replied, 'Isn't it wonderful? I was walking through the park a few months ago and I found this little package on the ground. The directions said to place it on the organ, keep it wet, and that it would prevent the spread of disease.
    I haven't had the flu all winter!
    Clean Sheets Win Championships. UP THE NOBBERS & CURRY POWER

  7. #587
    Substitute
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    Aug 2011
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sid Snot View Post
    Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties, and never been married. She was admired for her sweetness and kindness to all.
    One afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea. As he sat facing her old Hammond organ, the young minister noticed a cut glass bowl sitting on top of it. The bowl was filled with water, in the water floated, of all things, a condom!
    When she returned with tea and scones, they began to chat. The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water, its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him he could no longer resist. 'Miss Beatrice', he said, 'I wonder if you would tell me about this? He pointed to the bowl. 'Oh, yes,' she replied, 'Isn't it wonderful? I was walking through the park a few months ago and I found this little package on the ground. The directions said to place it on the organ, keep it wet, and that it would prevent the spread of disease.
    I haven't had the flu all winter!
    I like it.

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